Friday, June 12, 2009

Faith and me

Faith and I are growing distant. It's a combination of the 9-to-5 work hours and my own lack of patience with her attempts at growing up.

My childhood was filled with adults who were impatient with me. Feeling torn between being a good friend and having to instill some kind of discipline in her. It's the latter that usually comes through. I don't ever recall any adults that was patient with me as a child. This is threatening to pass through me to Faith. I am desperate to stop this generational curse. Forgive my strong word.

I remember the ready laughter and smiles Faith had for me. A few days ago, she flinched when I reached out to pat her back. It cuts my heart.

There were no parental role models. I can only bungle along feebly, hoping that every decision is a good one.

I can never give her enough love. How does one love through the daily grind of life?

1 comment:

cq said...

Bro, Jeremy did the same thing to me...when i started spending more time with him after my helper left, things got better, i guess we just need to continue our struggle/effort to spend more time with our kids even if they were being difficult..having said that i still believe in "...spare the rod, spoil the child" but really need God's help me to decern lah...